


Home

by Jyun2680



Category: Batman (Comics), Teen Titans (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, and the Titans love him and shower him with comfort, barely edited, in which Dick turns to the Titans when he remembers, soft cabin love vibes, we die like mne
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:40:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27036598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jyun2680/pseuds/Jyun2680
Summary: He remembers. He doesn't recall everything about his life- just bits and pieces- but it's enough for it to hurt.And that level of being exiled, abandoned, whatever they would want to call it hurt. It feels like bile on his throat, sour and bitter, a taste that lingers. It feels like he was left beaten, left alone for the vultures to peck out his gross, amnesiac mind.And maybe that's why Dick packed a bag and ran out of his apartment. And maybe that's why he's standing in front of Roy's apartment, clutching the strap of his bag like his life depends on it.
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Roy Harper
Comments: 12
Kudos: 122





	Home

He remembers. He doesn't recall everything about his life- just bits and pieces- but it's enough for it to hurt.   
Dick knows enough that his family would be ecstatic to take him with open arms and with smiles that would go on for miles. But maybe that's just it. They would be happy with Dick Grayson, but Ric Grayson wasn't enough for them.   
And that level of being exiled, abandoned, whatever they would want to call it hurt. It feels like bile on his throat, sour and bitter, a taste that lingers. It feels like he was left beaten, left alone for the vultures to peck out his gross, amnesiac mind.  
It hurt once he started to remember and it still hurts now.   
And maybe that's why Dick packed a bag and ran out of his apartment. And maybe that's why he's standing in front of Roy's apartment, clutching the strap of his bag like his life depends on it.   
Dick lets out a shaky breath and knocks.   
-  
Roy was seriously going to kill whoever was knocking at his door at three in the morning.   
"Alright, alright! I'm coming!" Roy shouts because the knocking is insistent and desperate.   
"What the fuck?" He whispers to himself once he looks through his peephole. Roy opens the door in one fell swoop.   
"Ric?" Roy sounds unsure and the name feels heavy on his tongue. It feels weird to call him by a name that didn't feel like it truly belonged to his lifelong friend. 

Dick still has his fist raised as if he wasn't truly expecting Roy to open the door. His hand falls back to his side.   
"Yeah- I mean- no," Dick responds awkwardly. He rubs small circles on his brows with the palms of his hands. A tick, Roy knows, that Dick does when he gets especially stressed.   
Roy softly grabs a wrist and pulls it away. "Dick?" The name is uttered quietly as he was afraid that his friend might run away at the mere mention of it.   
Dick looks back at his friend as if he wasn't very sure himself. Then there's a hard glint in his blue eyes.   
"Yeah, it's me." The reply is rough and calloused.   
There's something that opens in Roy and lets a bit of air inflate in his chest. He opens the door wider.   
"Come in." 

Roy watches Dick get settled inside the kitchen as he pours both of them glasses of water.   
"Thanks," said Dick as he took the glass from Roy. Dick doesn't drink from it, just holds on to it tightly. He stares down at his reflection in the pool of water.   
Roy brings his chair over next to Dick and at their distance their knees are almost touching. "We just gotta be uh...quiet cause Lian is sleeping right now," Roy says quietly.   
Dick looks up like a deer caught in the headlights. "Right, shit. Fuck- sorry, I could just leave." Dick bolts up in his chair and it teeters back dangerously. Roy catches it before it could crash onto the floor.   
"That's not what I meant," Roy whispers with his teeth grinding. He sets the chair back. "Sit your ass back down."   
Roy thanks whatever heavenly God is looking out for him tonight because for once Dick just complies and sits.  
"And take off your bag too." Because Dick is clutching onto that thing as if he's ready to run in a second if he has to. Dick holds it tighter like he really doesn't want to part with the bag, but he just deflates and slips it off of him.   
They both sit in silence, neither of them wanting to make the first move. Dick sits in his seat and his hands coil around his cup. Both men watch the condensation droplets descend from cup to table.   
Roy eventually sighs and slides a coaster beneath Dick's cup. Dick smirks and raises a single eyebrow. "When did you get all domestic?" The joke comes out rough and weak, but the sarcastic humor is all there.   
Roy sends him the finger in response.   
Speaking of being domestic, Roy wonders why non-amnesiac Dick Grayson is here out of all places and not with the Bats where they can give each other pats on the back and awkwardly smile at each other or whatever they do when they're happy.   
"So…" Roy draws out the O as he leans back in his chair. "What about the Batsy Bunch?"   
Roy does feel a pang of guilt when Dick winces because he came here to escape. But that wasn't them, was it? They tended to rip off the bandaid with each other even if it made them assholes while doing it.   
Roy takes Dick's hand in his when it looks like he's about to bolt again.   
"Dick, look at me."   
Roy gently guides Dick's head towards him with his free hand. His eyes are still glued to his bag.   
"Look at me," he repeats softly. Dick's eyes slowly meet his. And Dick sends him this look that sends Roy's stomach into somersaults. It's full of grief, a bit of sadness and anger too.   
"Dick, you can tell me anything." He moves his hand to grasp the back of Dick's neck. "You know that."  
Dick closes his eyes shut and exhales. His shoulders drop.   
"They just left me," came a quiet admission. It was barely a whisper. "I took a bullet to the head and fucking forgot everything." Dick lets out a wet laugh. He waves a wild hand at his head. "Just empty, ya know, and I just…"   
Dick combs his hair with his fingers and tugs on the knots even as it stings. "I just needed someone...anyone. But my family- they kept asking for something I couldn't give and they just left me alone once they found out."   
Roy's insides shake with anger and guilt as Dick confesses how Bruce and the rest treated him, the ways they tried to make him remember. It makes him ache.   
Fuck Bruce, Roy thinks, Fuck him because he was a grown-ass adult who everyone in that fucking family looked up to him and just followed him like a nasty shadow.  
"I was alone, Roy." Dick's voice is shaky like he's holding back a volume of tears. "When I needed them the most, they just fucking left."   
Roy pulls Dick towards him and he holds him tightly. "Man, I'm so fucking sorry. I'm sorry."   
-  
They moved to the living room. Dick just stares blankly at the television. He tugs on a particular stubborn knot in his hair. He tugs and tugs but it doesn't go away.   
Roy gently smirks and pulls Dick's hand down. "What are you even staring at?" Roy asks, "It's not even on."   
Dick gives a tiny shrug and hugs a pillow tightly deep into his chest. Roy holds back a heavy sigh.   
"I texted the team. They should be here soon, okay?" Because that's who they are- if one of them was in trouble, they would drop everything to save them from the world.  
Dick finally looks at him and nods with a sad, soft exhausted smile.   
As if on cue, there's a knock on his door. Roy stands to open the door and is greeted by Wally carrying bottles of orange soda and bags upon bags of chips.   
"Dude," Roy greets with a light chuckle.   
"Hey, man," Wally quickly greets as he bends over to peer over Roy's shoulder. "Where is he?"   
"Living room."   
Roy blinks and Wally isn't there anymore. The snacks and drinks are spread out on the coffee table with Wally standing over Dick.   
"Dick," Wally croaks out. His emerald eyes are glassy and his smile so wide that it's showing off a chipped tooth.   
"Hey, Wall-man."   
"Come here, man," Wally says when Dick makes no move to stand. He pulls Dick up with one tug and Dick's pillow falls to the ground with a soft thunk.   
Wally hugs Dick tightly. His head rests in the crook of Dick's neck. They both take in each other's familiar warmth. Wally feels Dick squeeze back and the way his fists grab tightly on the fabric of his shirt.   
Wally pulls away first. He grasps Dick's head between his hands. "I missed you so much, dude."   
"Me too, Walls."   
"You guys are adorable," Roy snarks out with a grin.   
"Shut up." Wally is laughing and pulls Roy into a group hug.   
Roy forgets this warmth when he spends time away from them, and every time he remembers it almost crushes him how much he misses them.  
\--------  
"-and Linda just kept laughing at me!" Wally throws his hands in indignation, but his eyes are glowing with love and joy.   
"Yeah, because you're a fucking idiot," Roy adds with a laugh.   
"Not you too!" Wally turns to Dick, "C'mon, dude, help me here!"   
Dick chuckles lightly. "Sorry, man, but spilling a whole bottle of mustard while you met Linda's parents for the first time is too hilarious not to laugh in your face."   
Wally hides his head in his hands. "See? This is why I never told you both."   
The muffled response only made both Dick and Roy laugh harder.   
There's a hard, sharp knock on the door.   
"I'll get it," said Wally. He runs to the door and opens it in a blink of an eye.  
Behind the door stood Kori and Donna.  
Dick leaps over the couch when he sees the two women stride into the apartment.   
"Donna," Dick exclaims softly. He opens up his arms and Donna jumps into them. Donna and Dick are platonic soulmates. The duo only had a deep love for each other, the kind of love that was somewhat different from what the rest of the Titans shared.   
Donna looks up and her eyes are wet and glossy. Her smile is so wide that her eyes crinkle. "You are never ever going to get away with the name Ric."  
Dick tips his head back and laughs. "I wouldn't think so."   
Donna grins and goes back in for a hug.   
"Oh, c'mon," Wally says as he points to himself and Roy, "What are we? Dead meat?"   
Donna giggles and finally lets go of Dick. "Sorry, sorry. Come here and give me a hug."   
"Dick," came a quiet call as Donna greeted the male redheads.  
"Kori," Dick answers back equally as soft.   
Kori cups her hands under Dick's jaw. Her green eyes wander around Dick's face as if she is tracking for any differences, any inconsistencies.   
"X'hal, Richard," the name Richard being emphasized with love, passion, and sweet history because their love was different too. "You are home."   
Dick wraps a hand on one of Kori's wrists and feels the fluttering beat of her pulse. "Yeah, I am."   
She drops down and kisses the crown of Dick's head. He breathes out a soft laugh and stands on his toes to kiss her on the cheek.   
Kori drops her hands to her sides. "Now I must greet the others!"   
Dick laughs again and he feels so much lighter than he remembers. 

The five of them are munching on snacks, just sharing what has been going on with their lives, what Dick had missed.  
They're softly laughing and dropping crumbs all over the couch and on the floor that Roy is sure going to have a hell of a time cleaning up when Garth opens the front door with a full smile.   
"Dickie!" He greets as he skids over to the couch. Garth squeezes Dick in his arms and swings him in the air.   
"Hey, I missed you too buddy," Dick says between laughs. 

The six of them get settled into the living room. Dick is sitting on the floor with Roy and Kori sitting to his right and left. On the couch sat Garth, Donna, and Wally.   
Dick rests his head with his eyes closed on Donna's knees as she cards through his hair.   
"When's the last time you conditioned your hair, Dickie?" she asks as she gently works through a tough knot.   
"Mm" was all Dick offered with a shrug.  
"So, a sad, tear-jerker movie or a laugh till you drop movie?" Wally asks as he scrolls through Netflix.   
Dick knew everyone was waiting for his answer. He opens his eyes and glances up at Wally.   
"Sad- make me fucking cry man," he finally answers.   
"The Notebook it is." 

Roy glances at Dick in the middle of the movie and sees his eyes are glassy and his teeth are sucking on the bottom of his lip. There are tear marks skidded over his cheeks. His fists are clenched white and his eyelids are half-opened as if he wasn't really paying attention to the movie.   
"Enough. You will hurt yourself," Kori says as if that was the cruelest thing in the world. She unfurls Dick's hand and wraps her hands around his.   
Roy does the same. He unfists Dick's hand by lifting each finger one by one. There are tiny crescent moon divots in the palm of Dick's hand. Roy traces them knowing if Dick had squeezed any harder he would have bled. Roy intertwines his fingers in Dick's hand.   
Roy brings his attention back to the movie even if the tiny, quiet sobs twists his gut.   
They always watch this movie- so much to the point where the scenes barely even sting for Roy. But it was never really about watching the movie, it was just an excuse for one of them to cry their heart out if they ever needed it- an excuse. 

"I'm going to get something non-sugary to drink," Donna announces to the group when they're discussing what they should watch for their third movie.   
"I'll go with," Roy says because Donna's smile is waning and tight.   
She nods and bends down to kiss the crown of Dick's head. "I'll go get you a glass of water."   
Dick looks like he's about to protest but Donna sends him a pointed look.   
"That would be great," he concedes.   
"That's what I thought."  
Donna and Roy walk over to his kitchen silently.   
"Tea?" Roy asks as he brings out his old electric kettle.   
Donna smiles but it doesn't quite reach her eyes. "That would be lovely."   
"It's gonna take a while."   
Donna takes out the tea bags and mugs because she's been here enough to know where everything is. "That's fine."   
Silence falls between them as the water boils. Donna doesn't look at Roy as she opens the tea bags from their paper packages.   
The group finally settles on a comedic foreign film called Kung Fu Hustle. The movie begins softly with the subtitles on, the volume turned low as possible for his sleeping daughter.   
"What happened?" Donna suddenly asks. She stares at Roy, her blue eyes piercing him.   
"I…" Roy trails off as he glances over to the living room. Dick probably knows that they were talking about him. Donna knows that Dick knows, but she loves him too much and wants to protect him too much to care.   
"Roy," Donna snaps quietly. And Roy loves Donna enough to know that she will squeeze the answer out of him if he doesn't cough up.   
"Bruce...just all of them were complete bastards to him. Dick told me that when he tried to go to the manor the first time after...y'know." Roy motions to the side of his head. "And they just made him go to the cave and they showed him everything, Donna." His voice is thick with anger and frustration. "The..the suit still covered in blood and a video of...of him getting shot." It was hard for him to keep his volume level. His hands grip on to his sweatpants when he realizes he's shaking.   
The water starts to boil next to him, the bubbles flaring up into the water boiler and popping into hot air once it reaches the surface.   
"No wonder he just left and ran," Roy finally says, "I would've."   
Donna walks over to him and softly slams the mugs onto the counter.   
"I try sometimes," she starts with a shuddering breath, "not to hate Bruce. Because I know Dick for all that he is, Roy, and I know a part of Dick will always love Bruce- will be always loyal to him and his crusade." She closes her eyes and brows furrow. "But it's just so hard sometimes when he does things like this. Think only about himself and not about Dick."   
"You are so much better than me, D, cause I hate him and I don't try not to."   
Donna peels open her eyes but doesn't add anything else. A thick silence falls between them. The boiler clicks to a stop once it's finished boiling. Neither of them moves to pour the water.   
"We never went to see him too," Donna confesses out loud in a whisper.   
Roy's guilt flares quietly in the pit of his stomach. "The Bats said we should leave him alone- that he was overwhelmed with everything else. Bruce said Dick didn't need us to pile on more stuff."   
Roy pours the water into both of the mugs.   
"But we left him alone, Roy. We shouldn't have settled on that answer." Donna puts the tea bag in her mug and watches the tea turn the steaming water into a murky brown. "We ran away, Roy," Donna admits. "We all did."   
Roy glances back to the living room. He knew the others carried the guilty weight of it too.   
Donna tosses her tea bag into the garbage. Her hand lands on top of his and she squeezes. "And we will apologize."  
"And he will forgive us."   
"He will," she repeats with a small smile, "because that is who he is."   
The two walk back to the living room with warm tea in their hands and Donna hands Dick his water. Dick smiles at her in thanks.   
\-----  
The sun is just starting to rise, casting the city in a soft orange light when the Titans decide it's time to leave. All of them are congregated at the door with no one wanting to leave.   
"Dick," Donna starts as she grabs his hands into hers. She brings their hands to her chest. "I'm so sorry."  
Dick fidgets under her stare. "You don't have to apologize," he says without looking at her.   
"No, man, we do," Roy speaks behind Donna. "We left you alone too."   
Dick brow furrows and he bites on the bottom of his lip. Wally walks up and puts a hand on Dick's shoulder. "I'm sorry too. We will never leave you again. I promise."   
Dick is silent as he takes in the words.   
"Richard," Kory starts, "We all are very sorry."   
"I'm sure Bruce told you to not see me," Dick whispered out.   
"Yeah," Garth says, "But it's on us for actually listening to the bastard."  
Dick lets out a wet, choked laugh. His expression crumples. "You guys really didn't need to apologize."  
Donna squeezes the hands in hers tighter. "Yes, we do."   
"Aw, c'mon guys, group hug!" The group laughs as loud they could without waking up the sleeping child as Garth takes them all in.   
"We love you, Richard," said Kory.  
"I love you guys too," Dick says in the middle.   
\----  
Dick hears a loud whispered conversation reeling him out of his slumber.   
Then a weight drops on to his stomach making him peel his eyes open.   
A small round face with long black hair and bright forest green eyes greets him. Dick automatically smiles.  
"Good morning, Lil' arrowhead. I like your pajamas." Dick pokes at the pink sequined unicorn in the middle of the shirt.   
"Lian!" Roy scolds with hands at his hips. "Dick was sleeping."   
"Sorry! But I just got so excited! I rarely see Uncle Dick."   
"It's fine. I was about to wake up anyway." He sits up while holding Lian making sure she doesn't fall. Dick faces the seven-year-old in his lap. "And I missed you too ya little brat." Dick tickles Lian at her sides.   
Lian shoves the hands away as she snorts out laughter. "Are the others here too?"  
Lian looks around as if she half expects the team to pop out of the corner.   
"Um…" Roy says unsure how to begin. Lian glances back and forth between Roy and Dick and her eyes widen in disbelief. "No! They left, didn't they?" Lian pouts and she flops back on to Dick's legs. "So unfair. I miss out on all the fun stuff."   
"Hey, at least you got to see me, right? I was about to leave too but your dad managed to convince me to sleep on the couch."   
Lian sits back up quickly with a cat-like grin. "Yeah! It's been like forever since I've seen you." Liam spreads her arms wide to accentuate her point.   
"And speaking of missing out- you should be getting ready for school or else you're going to be late."   
Lian groans out dramatically but slides off of Dick. She tugs on his hand until he gets up from the couch as well.  
"I want Uncle Dick to do the special hair!"  
Roy shakes his head and gives in. "Okay, but be quick. I'll make breakfast."   
Lian smiles and skips in her step. "C'mon, Uncle Dick, let's go to my room."   
"Okay, okay!" Dick chuckles out and lets him be dragged by the seven-year-old.   
\--  
Dick is sticking out his tongue as he twists on the final hair tie. "And finished! Go take a look in the mirror."  
Lian slides off of his lap and inspects her space buns thoroughly. "It's perfect. Even better than Daddy's."   
She already changed into jeans and a bright red monster truck T-shirt that read Vroom Vroom in bright neon yellow letters. An iconic fashion look with the space buns if Dick says so himself.   
Lian twirls over to face Dick. "Thank you, Uncle Dick."   
Then, her mood shifts. She glances down with her bottom lip jutted out. Her hands are intertwined behind her back and her toes curl in the rug.   
"Daddy said you got hurt real bad and that's why you couldn't come and visit," Lian shots her head back up. "But you're okay now, right?"   
Dick's smile shakes and he feels his chest squeeze. "I...um…" Dick starts lamely. His mind feels both rushed and blank at the same time.   
"You're not dying, right?" Lian asks with wide eyes. Her bottom lip trembles.   
A weight plummets in Dick's stomach and his hands hurry to squeeze Lian's sides. "Oh God, Lian, no, I'm not dying! I'm okay, I promise. I'm just…" Dick glances down at Lian's curled toes trying to find the word that would describe him. "I'm just not perfect," he finishes weakly.   
Lian's toes unfurl. She cocks her head and her lips upturn in the same way Roy does when he's confused. Dick smiles softly at the similarity.   
"Okay…" Lian begins, "then you can stay until you get all better!"   
"Lian, I don't know about that."   
Lian rolls her eyes. "What do you mean you don't know? You can't be all by yourself when you're sick. And besides, I could tell Daddy really missed you too. He would stare at the Titans group picture and get this sad look." Lian's face contorted into a poutful, longing look.   
Dick felt a warm blush spread across his cheeks and ears. "Really?"   
Liam vigorously shook her head. Dick feels something pull and hammer inside his chest and he gives in. "Alright fine, but just for a couple of days, okay?"   
Liam grins and pulls on Dick's hand once more, dragging him out the door. "C'mon Daddy will be almost finished with breakfast and he makes the most awesome pancakes! They're the best things in the world."   
"Even better than my space buns?"  
Lian pauses as if she was giving it a serious thought, then she firmly nods her head. "Yes, even better than those."  
\-----  
It's been a full week since Dick took a sudden residence in the Harper household, and Roy could tell his childhood friend was getting antsy. He was on his 50th walk of the night and told Roy halfway out the door with his laptop in tow that he was going to hang at the cafe that was 10 blocks over.   
Roy was alone for the night with Dick releasing some pent up energy and Lian at her friend's for a sleepover. He noiselessly chews on his Chinese takeout as he skims over the city's traffic and security cameras. With Lian in his life, Red Arrow had been making less and less of an appearance but it didn't hurt to check up in his city once in a while.   
Roy chokes on a piece of Lo Mien when a sleek black car speeds through one of the traffic cameras.   
"What the hell?" Roy seethes through clenched teeth. He clicks a few keys on his laptop and slows the clip down. "What the ever living hell!"   
It was the batmobile. Batman is in his city.   
And all Roy can see is red, boiling hot, volcanic red.   
He quickly changes into his Red Arrow outfit and grabs his gear and leaves. 

Red Arrow wants to kick at the parked batmobile in the abandoned alleyway. But he knows that the car is rigged to the teeth, and if he touches it in the wrong way he knows he's going to regret it. So, he swallowed the childish instinct and climbed up the fire escape to the rooftops. He picked a direction and just ran. 

Finally, finally- after an hour of just searching Roy finds him standing over the roof of a failed family diner. And Roy still feels the anger shaking, screaming inside of him.   
Roy slides out an arrow from his quiver and knocks it back on to the bow. He faces it towards Batman's curved back.   
"Get the fuck out of here."   
Bruce turns around to face Roy with an impassive expression adorned on his face. Batman makes no move, just stands there like an ice-cold statue.   
The coldness starts to seep into Roy's hard hot anger. He feels the tug of the wire on his bow as he draws it more back. "Get out. Now."   
But Bruce just continues to stand there. The cape billows in the wind.   
"No," was all Batman said.   
And that pisses off Roy even more. The seething anger comes back in full force. Roy releases his fingers.   
Batman sidesteps out of the way, just narrowly avoiding the arrow. It digs itself into the roof's cement floor.   
Roy is already releasing another arrow. Bruce tries to jump out of the way, but Roy already calculated this move and nocks back another arrow. It only hits him in the arm.   
Batman growls in frustration and leaps towards Red Arrow in three bounds. He takes the bow from Roy's hands and tries to deliver a punch. Roy blocks it and tries to knee Bruce in the groin. Bruce moves out of the way of the hit and pulls Roy's head forward for Bruce to knee him in the nose.   
Roy stumbles back gingerly touching his nose, blinking out the stars that swim across his vision.  
"Let me talk to him."   
Roy wants to say he doesn't take orders from him. He wants to say Bruce doesn't have his claws over like he does in Gotham.   
But all that comes out is a solid "No."   
Roy curls his hands into large fists and Batman follows suit.   
Roy is about to charge forward when a steely voice calls out, "That's enough."  
The anger inside Roy withers a tad at the voice. A figure drops down from the building over. He hands gracefully without a sound.   
"Dick," Roy greets, voice thick with emotion.   
Dick steps out of the shadows and the moonlight shines on his sculpted, round face. He's still wearing the grey hoodie and black joggers that he left in. His blue eyes are icy and his shoulders are drawn back.   
"Stay down, Red Arrow," Dick commands.   
Roy wants to argue, but Dick sends him a look that sends all protests down his throat. The way Dick leads is so different from the way Bruce does. It's as if Dick gathers all the starlight in the world and shines it upon him.   
Roy brings his fists down and Batman relaxes a smidge. Dick strides over to Batman in cool, unshaken confidence.   
Roy remembers when he first met Batman. He was terrified of him and how tall he stood in the bulky armor of his. But then Dick called Bruce an idiot right to his face and Roy thought Dick was the coolest person ever since then.

"Dick," Batman says, "Come home."   
The inside of Dick's mouth tastes like metal. His stomach curls inwards and forwards.   
"No," Dick growls, "I stayed away for a reason."  
Dick always has been good reading at Bruce. He sees the way Bruce's mouth flicks down and the way his nose scrunches up just reads hurt. Dick tries to ignore the guilt that boils in his gut.   
Bruce steps forward, shortening the distance between the two. Dick resists the urge to take a step back.  
"You belong in Gotham."  
Dick breathes through his nose. "I don't...," Dick tries to find the lost words on his tongue. "I am not going back, Bruce. I need time- time away."   
It hurts too much; I felt like you betrayed me; You hurt me- goes unsaid.   
"They miss you."  
Dick's guilt flares and all he sees are his brothers, sister, Alfred- just everyone wearing the same hurt expression Bruce wears. He swallows the drowning guilt down and that is left is a wave of simmering anger.   
"You can't use them against me."   
Bruce bares his teeth and his cheeks clench. Frustration.   
"Come home," Bruce repeats in a growl, "Dick."   
Roy, who was holding himself back decently, scuttled behind Dick. Dick brings his hand up, silently ordering Roy to stand back.   
Dick feels like his whole mouth is dry and his tongue feels like a weight.   
He breathes and quietly admits, "It just doesn't feel like home...anymore."  
Bruce hears the words like a hard slap across the face. He takes a step back as he stumbles to catch his breath.   
Dick closes his hands into tight fists at his sides. "I just need time, B."  
Bruce doesn't say anything else. Dick takes a step back and turns around.   
"Let's go, Red Arrow."   
Dick jumps off the roof without bothering to hear his reply. 

Roy grabs his discarded bow and thumbs the old scratches and dents. He doesn't spare Batman a glance.   
"Y'know," Roy says from the edge of the roof, "Dick is kind and he gives and gives without complaint. But just this one time when he asks something of you, just please give it to him without any of your bullshit dramatics."   
"Roy," Dick calls from below. Roy glances down. Dick's hands are stuffed inside his pockets and his hood is drawn up. Dick's expression is tight and unreadable. "Let's go."  
Roy nods and he feels Bruce staring at him, but he leaves the still statue and drops next to Dick.   
"Let's take my bike."  
Dick nods and they both silently walk to where he parked it. The drive over is equally silent. And all Roy feels is Dick's tight grasp at his sides. 

They both step inside Roy's apartment with that same quietness. It feels like Dick was miles away even though he was standing right next to him.   
Roy sighs as he puts away all of his equipment and then sits in his kitchen. Dick was leaning against a counter with his arms crossed and his hood still up.   
Everything in the kitchen was still everything the way he left. His Chinese food soggy and cold abandoned near his laptop. The only thing new was Dick's laptop sitting next to his.   
"How did you know where to find me?" Toy asks, and he feels like he was breaking some sacred silence.   
"I came back from the cafe and it looked like you left in a hurry," Dick nods towards the food. "I just thought I could help out with whatever pulled you away. And then I saw the batmobile and just figured you went after him."   
Another silence falls between them. Only the slight rustle of Roy putting the food away can be heard. He throws the wooden chopsticks away in the garbage and shuts his laptop.   
"You're leaving aren't you?"   
Dick sags his shoulders and uncrosses his arms. He takes his hood down and looks his friend straight in the eye. "Yeah, yeah I am."   
"When?"  
"In a couple of days. I've been looking at a couple of apartments in New York. I have a job interview at a kid's gym on Thursday."  
Dick moves from his place to the table and sits. He moves his chair closer- so close that their knees are almost touching. "I'm sorry, Roy, I really am. I've been working up the nerve to tell you-"  
"Dick, I know you," Roy interrupts without any heat, "It's not like you to just sit here and wait for the next move."   
Dick smiles softly at that; it's small, exhausted, and not fully there. It pulls at Roy's heart.   
"I appreciate what you guys have done for me. I know I kinda crashed here without any notice."  
Roy puts his hand on top of Dick's, brushes his calloused fingers on his knuckles.   
"Dick, I-- me and Lian love you-"  
Dick interrupts Roy with a heated kiss and he quickly pulls away. Roy is left gasping like a fish, stuttering in the oxygen air.   
"I'm sorry," Dick apologizes with a wince, "I don't know why I did that."   
Roy finally finds his air and breathes out an amused chuckle at Dick's heated blush.  
"Dick, it's fine." Roy cups his hand on Dick's cheek. "It's okay."   
Dick bites the bottom of his lip. His lip crashes into Roy's slowly and this time he is expecting it. Roy pulls forward, putting everything of himself into that kiss.   
Suddenly, they're both standing and stumbling over to Roy's bedroom. Roy kisses Dick's lip, his cheeks, and his neck.   
Dick growls in frustration when they trip over each other's feet for the umpteenth time. Dick lifts Roy with grace and ease and Roy wraps his legs around Dick's waist obligingly.   
God, Roy doesn't ever remember his bedroom being this far.   
Finally, they make it. Dick sits on the bed with Roy on his lap. Roy peels off Dick's sweater, and thank God Dick chose not to wear anything underneath.   
Roy pushes Dick further onto the bed. His hands glide through his hair.   
"Ow," Dick winces.   
Roy stills and sits back up. "What?"   
"Nothing, it's just…" Dick trails off as he lightly touches the side of his head. "You touched my scar."  
"Oh," Roy's mouth scrunches up. "Does it hurt often?"  
Dick shakes his head. "No, I forget about it sometimes. But then I touch it the wrong way and it just reminds me...that it's there."  
"Does it hurt a lot?"   
Dick pulls Roy back towards him. "Roy, I'm okay."   
Roy sighs, contemplates whether to go on or not, but Dick sends him a look and Roy gives in.   
Roy kisses and kisses- and Dick forgets just for a moment what the world is trying to make him be.   
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
It's two days later when Dick is standing at the front door with his backpack over his shoulders.   
Lian squeezes him tight and presses her head against his shirt. "Do you have to go?" she muffles out.   
Dick lets out a light laugh and gently peels off the little girl. He holds her tightly by the shoulders and bends down to look her in the eyes. "Me leaving is a part of me becoming...perfect again." Dick wraps his arms around her tiny frame and whispers, "Oh, but I'll miss you, Lil' arrowhead."  
Dick releases her and stands with a small grunt. Roy puts a hand on his daughter's shoulder and holds it tightly for comfort.   
"I could still drive you to the airport," Roy offers.   
"I know, but I just think I gotta do this alone. It feels right."   
Even though the distance between him and Dick is only a step wide, it felt incredibly huge.   
Dick intertwined his fingers around Roy's. "I'll call you once I arrive in New York."   
Roy squeezes the hand in his. "Yeah, I'll be waiting."   
Dick grins and turns back to Lian. "Bye, you brat."   
"Bye," Dick says once more to Roy.   
Roy quickly sweeps in to lightly kiss Dick on the cheek before he can second guess himself. "Bye," Roy mirrors back.   
Dick's smile widens and his fingers bloom around his cheek where Roy had kissed him.   
“I should get going.” Dick shares a final smile at the two and turns to shut the door behind him.   
“C’mon, let’s get started on breakfast, yeah?”   
Lian nods as she wipes her nose with her sleeve. Both of them head towards the kitchen to get started on the day.  
Roy wants Dick to be right next to him, but he knows that Dick needs this- a new beginning.   
Besides, Roy thinks with a toothy smile as he tucks his phone into his pant’s pocket, he always a call away.


End file.
